August 10, 2004

Fantasy Football is here!

Those of you that are new to 3leggeddog might not be aware of the fact that I participate in a Fantasy Football league with some guys I work with. The live draft takes place on August 17th and the first game is shortly thereafter. I'll be providing weekly updates since I know several of you followed the teams progress from last year.

For those of you that want to know the name of the team, read on. This was originally posted in October of 2003.

My team is named "Morning Wood".

Now I'm sure you're thinking "Morning Wood"? Why would someone name their team "Morning Wood". There are many reasons, Dear Reader, besides the fact that I have the brain of a 14 year old boy. The guys and girls in this league talk a lot of smack and what better way to cut them off at the knees than with the following responses:

If I lose: Oh man, your boys gave my Morning Wood quite a lickin' this weekend.
If I lose badly: Congrats, Bro, you smacked the crap outta my Morning Wood.
If I lose really bad: Son, I have not had anyone beat my Morning Wood like that in quite some time. You are to be congratulated. My Morning Wood salutes you.

If I win, it's something along the lines of:

You got spanked by the Morning Wood!
My Morning Wood tore your ass to shreds this weekend.
Bow down and worship the Morning Wood.

See? Even if I lose, I win. So, Dear Reader, sit back, relax, and keep your eyes on my Morning Wood. I predict good things this year.

*Note: If you are unaware of the "morning wood" phenomena as it relates to the male anatomy, please ask the nearest male. When he stops laughing, he'll tell you.