August 17, 2004

Is it hard being beautiful?

Does a woman ever get tired of being beautiful?

I thought about this today as I was helping one of the women in my office. To me, she is one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen. She's tall, with dark hair, a beautiful face, and a great body. As I was following her back to her office this morning, I happened to notice how some of the guys were looking at her. They were in town for training and had apparently not seen her before. Several of them gave her the full-body once over, and I'll admit, it even made me uncomfortable. That's when I started to wonder if being beautiful could get tiring?

I appreciate a beautiful woman as much as another man, but I try to be discreet about it. Part of it is because I get very shy around them and part of it is because it just feels rude to give them the once over. Now don't misunderstand, if the woman is wearing something designed to draw attention to them (like Britany or Paris or Pam Anderson), then I'm all eyes. In this case, I'm talking about someone "normal" that I see around town. I’m talking about a woman who looks as good in a baseball cap as she does in a dress. I’m talking about naturally beautiful women, not the surgically enhanced kind.

I wonder if any of these women think, “Would you just stop looking at me”. I’d have to imagine it would get irritating after a while or am I just being naïve? Never having been in that situation, I can’t accurately answer the question. I'm more like the gristle you cut off before getting to the good stuff. What do you think?


I am not addressing this as someone who has been in this situation -- I haven't. But I've had enough friends who are beautiful women to have gleaned a small amount of insight.

I don't think it's being beautiful they get tired of -- they are self-critical just like us "gristle" types -- it's that they get tired of having their looks be the first thing people (read: guys) comment on in order to try to win them over with flattery. Being told "You're so beautiful" by every guy who wants to get to know them (read: get them into bed) gets old.

I had a friend I frequently went out with in social situations. She was gorgeous, built, stylish, with beautiful hair, exotic looks and an alluring foreign accent. In other words, a total guy magnet.

Being out with her was a social experiment in progress. Invariably, guys would stare when she came in the door, then fall all over themselves when she got closer and spoke, but when they made it over to the table and started talking to her, without fail they would tell her how beautiful she was. At that point I could see the wall come down behind her eyes and it was game over.

Because she was also absolutely brilliant and had the most incredible mind I've ever known. Being beautiful wasn't an accomplishment; all the amazing things she had done, thought and created were her accomplishments and few even bothered to try to see past her looks to who she truly was. Telling her she was beautiful wasn't exactly a news flash, and by focusing on that guys really missed out.

Posted at August 18, 2004 04:05 AM

Good Q. Some of my friends - true Catherine Zeta beauties - dont get tired of being beautiful. They just get tired of annoying men approaching/staring/hollering at them. Everyone secretly loves being adored....but not by ppl you dont really care about. But hey, next time I run into Penelope Cruz, Ill ask if her is shes sick of looking at that pretty face in the morning.

Posted at August 18, 2004 02:02 PM

where the heck did I hear this? "Beautiful girls want to be told they're smart, and smart girls want to be told they're beautiful."

Posted at August 18, 2004 04:34 PM

let me preface this by saying I'm not claiming to be a beauty, just not horrible-looking. BUT - "you're so beautiful" got tired the 3rd time someone used that line on me. one of the best things about being visibly pregnant is being able to walk by a construction site and not attract lewd comments. so yeah, I'd say that truly beautiful women sometimes get tired of being beautiful.

Posted at August 19, 2004 06:03 AM

Obviously I can't speak from experience, but I can relate a humorous anecdote.

A good friend is a smashing 6-foot beauty who is well on her way to finishing top in her class in law school. Completely brilliant. On her way home from a particularly exhausting workout at the gym, she walked by a construction site and received not one, not two, but six cat calls. In fact, one guy even said, "Hey Baby, come on over here," as she walked by, trying to ignore them.

But something snapped. She whipped around and out of her darling mouth flew some of the most vile expletives known to humankind. The poor construction worker, unwise enough to have opened his big yap, promptly turned tail and ran for cover, as she continued to berate the rest of the cat-callers.

So, yeah, I guess you could say she got tired of it.

Posted at August 20, 2004 11:17 AM

When Beautiful women say they are tired of being beautiful, make sure they are just lying. They just want to show themselves as victimized women for being beautiful the only thing they did wrong -How cool!

Posted at November 6, 2004 05:38 AM